It has been so hot the last few days. We were under a heat index till Wednesday here in Missouri. Yesterday it rained all day and today it cloudy and feels like a fall day.
I can’t believe how fast this summer has gone by. I really and truly didn’t do anything this summer but once and that was going on a friends boat for dinner. Other than that I spent the whole summer in the house.
I’m cooking breakfast for my friend Sonnie. He’s an older black man who lives up in St. Louis but comes here to this neighborhood to mow grass as this is where he was raised. Our landlord let’s him store his mowing equipment in our garage. He has his on little section that still leaves us plenty of room to park 2 cars if we want. I feel in love with him immediately because I think he senses how out-of-place I felt at first. He’s been so nice and brings my neighbors over to meet me so I feel safe and not out of place. He tells me where not to go that isn’t safe and where to go that is safe. I really like that about him. He’s a good God-fearing man, but likes to drink him a good cold bear after cutting grass. He reminds me of an uncle as he is always in long sleeve shirts and overalls.
Each day is getting easier and I don’t feel so out-of-place like I did. I still miss Georgia though and always will. I miss the girls spending time with me as that was the high light of my life. It really hurts to think of the past but I don’t allow my self as I can’t go back there again and allow myself another break down. It seems like it was a dream I quess of a great time where I had children in my life again.
Georgia has seemed the closest place to home I have ever felt since I left Kentucky many years ago when I married my husband. I miss Kentucky at times but it’s never really seemed like home to me. I always felt I didn’t belong there and now when I visit it’s like a horrible dream of who all is dead and gone. I don’t know very many people there even anymore.
When I left there I just sorta never looked back….
Well breakfast is finished and Sonnie is finished mowing up the street and out front . Gonna go sit outside with him and have breakfast.. love hearing him tell stories about the ghetto when he was growing up..till next time.. take care…